Not sitting and pondering about Therianthropy and my Theriotype is rather relaxing. I mean I still do think about it but am prompted to do so much less often, so instead of being almost constantly on the lookout for behaviours/habits I just occasionally notice something while I am doing it. Feels more natural to me. :P Hard to describe sometimes.
And it is something I have been thinking for a while now, first with my inclinations toward "spiritually I am Jaguar (now I replace this with Lioness) but psychologically I seem to have a connection to all cats." Reading Padfootapos;s essay "Itapos;s okay not to be a Therianthrope" really pushed at my brain too. I do still think I am a felid-person, likely Lioness, in the Therianthropic sense. But in the non-Therianthropic sense I feel as if I am a cat-person, I have this connection with felids that I do not seem to have with other creatures. I am far from a cat behaviourist but I get along with most domesticated ones very well. My own room mateapos;s cat likes me more than she likes him now, even though he is very devoted and is the one who feeds her. And there have been many instances of stray cats just coming right up to me and demanding to be petted, avoiding every other person in the group I might be with. I go up to them as well, stray or just outdoors with a collar, and have never had a problem (I know when not to pet the kitty)
I think thereapos;s more to explore here, but yeah.
Kinda not as involved in my spiritual life right now, still doing plenty of reading and research but almost no actual practise. Not sure if this is a good or a bad thing. I was given some clear mandates though and I still need to go through with them, I think after I have completed my tasks I will feel more drawn to it once more. My very broad area of pre-Christian pagan study has left me with strong pulls in some directions. There is still the strong pull of Germanic paganism, that is from the mainland, but also further East too. Latvian, Estonian, Lithuanian. Baltic. Which in turn leads me to research what I can of Russian paganism, as it had an influence on it. But mostly I am drawn to that specific area. I know it does not entirely matter, I guess, but I was so very set on making a rather general personal reconstruction based on the lands of my familial ancestry. And then I found out on Thanksgiving that while part of my motherapos;s family tree indeed does come from Germany (and western parts at that, undoubtedly plenty of Frank blood/influence in there too,) it is just the most researched half. The other part actually comes from lands much closer to where my fatherapos;s part of my family tree comes from. It all seems to be focused on that strip, starting at the south part of the Baltic sea (Poland, Latvia, Lithuania) and spreading down a bit (Romania, Ukraine.) Bwa. Considering I really do feel as if it is my long-ago and ancient ancestors pulling me in this direction, it is a nice affirmation in my head. Anyways. That sort of paganism is really difficult to research and I know I will never be spot on or completely free of modern influences, but I do believe in a living religion and know in my heart that I will be guided down the right paths. Already I am finding parallels to Freyja and Frigg. Well it is more spread out, there is not one specific deity I can point to and say "that is the same one." But there are a group which have the traits. And a really interesting point is that in much of the surviving folklore from those areas, birds are the guides for spirits to the land of the dead. I am (so far) personally interpreting this as birds being guides for the spirit world in general, in-part thanks to my own experiences with visualizations, but of course I could be entirely off the mark. Ah well.
Mostly my life consists of eat, work, sleep. Well and hooping. Cleared space in the basement now that it is cold out, and hopefully getting a new hoop today
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